28 October 2006
Popiah Probability
Today i was doing 2004 Math paper and i felt quite good doing it. turns out i made a million careless mistakes.
And while doing it i was dying of hunger.S
o after i finished it i went to the coffee shop near by to buy my dinner and a popiah.
It was a new stall and the auntie was really bad at making popiah.
I ordered one popiah, and another customer ordered 2.
So the auntie made them, she was super gancheong and bad inexperienced.
She made the three popiahs together.
the first one was fine
she didnt roll the second one properly
and so one side was opened and some ingredients spilt out
the third one had contents that were too wet and the popiah pi broke!
so she wrapped it with another popiah pi again.
what is the probablity that i will get the good popiah??
I got the super thick skinned popiah anyways.
Yucks. I'm not buying it anymore..
I wanted to tell the auntie to relax when i saw her making the popiah..
22 October 2006
on a road headed for destruction
and i can't find the strength to swerve around
Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this all on my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road
I'm on Jesus take the wheel
不要用压力两个字磨灭我的痛楚
谁会愿意 谁会留意
虽不愿意付出，心中默默希望着有人能为我。就这段时间而已，有人吗？
当然没有。
dont expect anything from me. why do certain people assume that i will do everything they say.
why don't they ask if i can even do it, why do they ask when i will make it
i won't be doing anything until 23rd Nov. too bad..im going missing. settle anything yourselves. its not like im indispensible anyway.
if your pea-sized examinations had allowed you to shrink small responsibilities
i think i have sufficent justification to ignore everyone till my As are over.
这就是我自私的一面。
它不是我的一小部分，不要因为我从没有表现过而误会。
明明晓得是不好的，
但我就是没有力量去改变自己。
我
是什么东西?
19 October 2006
its been eons since i came online.
and i am still angry. still in not a good productive mood.
i read pam's blog. and glori's.
we're all in foul mood.. at least a downside. moodswings during this promos to As phase
this sucks.
i just ignored ppl totally. i do selective msg-replies.
i choose to ignore what i know i have been entrusted to.
michelle wouldnt be pleased.
and i know God hasn't been for the past 5 days.
i am not going to lag and waste time in the reading room
im trying the library tmr.
i hope i wake up earlier. but i think rest is still important.
i must finish my chem paper three to be done on saturday.
i must do at least 2 math papers tomorrow.
i must spend time.. i cant just keep deceiving myself.
its only 15 days away or less.
i cant waste them any longer. i havent started on two subjects
15 October 2006
somethings you know you shouldnt be complaining
sometimes you know that you will sound self centred when saying.
but sometimes, too, you can't hold it in.
i seriously feel cheated. seriously..
you know how much time i wasted. its not something merely mathematical.. its the prime time of the day i need to get geared up for me to go on for the rest of the day.
its not like you can get into the mood right after you reach home to continue on.
and its not like my A levels are thousand years away and i have all the time to study it
neither am some super smart freak who can cope with my syllabus with no sweat
i am at the border of failing TWO subjects.
you think its easy making the decision to turn up?
you think making the decision based on FALSE INFORMATION was pleasant?
As pleasant as a stinking rotting detritus in your mouth it is.
why. is it very funny to answer ambiguous crap to someone who really wants to find out the situation and really wants to put in the effort should there be a need.
you think its funny?!
irksome
totally revolting.
smiles are merely useless exasperating covers to the problem.
stop smiling. irritating.
really, i think i should let you guys see the real me.
i am not miss lame and funny and everybody's favourite 12-year-old looking 18 year old
you want me nasty i can be.
of course i am not turning nasty.
but i dont see a need to be nice ANYMORE.
i could have finished my chem syllabus and my math papers and my PAP. thanks a lot man!
13 October 2006
hmm, i used to question how come people die.
why do they waste away.
i didnt know anyone who died personally..but i still do know part of the pain it inflicts.
or so i think.
we are all going to die anyway.
its like we all got this terminal illness. who won't die?
and the countless dramas i've seen about people contracting terminal illnesses (I exclude sappy korean dramas)
with the character, being at first mean and bossy.
and knowing about things in their life that they are doing wrong
but never had the strength to change them
when they have been diagnosed with the whatever funny rare disease..
they change for the better
they find the strength
they live their life to the fullest
perhaps sometimes to live life fullest, we must perceive death rightly.
I was thinking on the bus home today.
what if i had only 3 months to live
I would definitely not laze in my bed in the mornings.
nor stay up late doing absolutely nothing but being a couch potato
I would not complain that the canteen food sucks
I would not want my friends to know..at first
but want to savour every moment of my normal life before it deterioates to one without dignity
I want to do 3 main things: thanking the people around me is one of them.
death may not be such a far away event actually.
so why am i wasting time doing nonsensical things?
12 October 2006
This Man
In only a moment truth was seen
Revealed this mystery
The crown that showed no dignity he wore
And the king was placed for all the world to show disgrace
But only beauty flowed from this place
Would you take the place of this man
Would you take the nails from his hands
Would you take the place of this man
Would you take the nails from his hands
He held the weight of impurity
The Father would not see
The reasons had finally come to be to show
The depth of His grace flowed with every sin erased
He knew that this was why he came
And we just don't know
The blood and water flowed
And in it all He shows
Just how much He cares
And the veil was torn
So we could have this open door
And all these things have finally been complete
Would you take the place of this man
Would you take the nails from his hands
Thanks for the O levels results
Thanks for the failed appeals back into NJ
Thanks for moving me to HC against my wishes
Thanks for blessing me with dedicated tutors
Thanks for blessing me in finances
Thanks for the materialistic wants and not needs
Thanks for OCIP Nongkhai
Thanks for the grace every time i woke up late
Thanks for the strength to combat my sleeping disorder
Thanks for the company I have in school when i mug
Thanks for the dinner from Mr Pang when i mug late in school
Thanks for showing me that CCA achievements do not mean having a life
Thanks for the break-up
Thanks for the grace you shown me every block tests and promos/prelims
Thanks for the wisdom and understanding You lavished upon me
Thanks for giving me a guide in life
Thanks for the cross.
Thanks for loving me for who i am.
Thank You, Jesus :)
10 October 2006
(=
感谢主 即使天色未常蓝
感谢主 纵然路旁有荆棘
因为主已经应许 日子如何 力量也必如何
03 October 2006
WATCH! be on guard!
For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools and exchangd the glory of the immortal God for images made to look like mortal man and birds and animals and reptiles.
-Romans 1:21-23-
sounds like for the Gentiles?
despite my grades. I neither truly glorified him, nor fully gave thanks to him.
Deep in my heart I know there is some part of me that claim myself to be wise. Wise enough to make it into HC, to get 2Bs, wise enough to perhaps get As for my A levels.
But no, I shall not exchange the glory of the immortal God for images of a 4A & A1 A levels cert.
=-=-=-=-=
What then? Shall we sin because we are not under the law but under grace? By no means!! Don't you know that when you offer yourselves to someone to obey him as slaves, you are slaves to the one whom you obey - whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness?
-Romans 6:15-16-
a little warning from my sister last night about Anti-nomanism . i'm appauled how great congregations, so famous and having blessed so many in the faith can fall just like this.
its the end days. and we are to be on our guard..for the enemy is like a lion prowling around us.
I was just so insensitiveto the Holy Ghost. I was listening to hillsongs that day and it dawned on me that secular music may carry the spirit of anti-Christ. and then it dawned on me, what if.. what if one day Christian music required discernment too? What can I do without music for the Lord. and i concluded that those days are dark, and far off.. perhaps in the later part of my life. It would be terrible! I thought.
But I forgot I was uncomfortable listening to some lyrics in the United We Stand album.
I didn't realised.
=-=-=-=-=
I knew such days would come. with increased intensity and frequency. But it just startles me how near it is. You know, i find my looming A levels dwarfed so greatly by this urgent matter.
You who don't believe in Christianity, who don't believe in my God.. who are my friends and respect me for my faith. thank you :)
But read this below, it won't take too much of your time nor cause any harm to you
this written about 2 millenia ago:
if one day you find the world coming to a horrible state, rmb.. it was long foretold.
Signs of the End of the Age
As he (Jesus) was leaving the temple, one of this disciples said to him. 'Look, Teacher! What massive stones! What magnificent buildings!'
' Do you see all these great buildings?' replied Jesus. 'Not one stone here will be left on another; every one will be thrown down.'
As Jesus was sitting on the Mount of Olives opposite the temple, Peter, James, John and Andrew asked him privately, 'Tell us, when will these thigns happen? And what will be the sign that they are all about to be fulfilled?'
Jesus said to them:' Watch out that no one decieves you. Many will come in my name, claiming, 'I am he', and will deceive many. When you hear wars and rumours of wars, do not be alarmed. Such things must happen, but the end is still to come. Nation will rise agaisnst nation, and kingdom agaisnt kingdom. There will be earthquakes in various places, and famines, These are the beginning of birth pains.
'You must be on your guard. You will be handed over to the local councils and flogged in the synagogues. On account of me you will stand before governers and kings as witnesses to them. And the gospel must first be preached to all nations. Whenever you are arrested and brought to trail, do not worry beforehand about what to say. Just say whatever is given you at the time, for it is not you speaking, but the Holy Spirit.
Brother will betray brother to death, and a father his child. Children will rebel against their parents and have them put to death. All men will hate you because of me, but he who stands firm to the end will be saved.
When you see 'the abonmination that causes desolation' standing where it does not belong - let the reader understand - then let those who are in Judea flee to the moutnains. Let no one on the roof of his house go down or enter the house to take anything out. Let no one in the filed go back to get his cloak. How deradful it will be in those days for pregnant womean and nursing mothers! Pray that this will not take place in winter, because those will be days of distress unequaled from the beginning, when God created the world, until now - and never to be equaled agian. If the Lord had not cut short those days, no one would survive. But for the sake of the elect, whom he has chosen, he has shortened them. At that time if anyone says to you, 'Look here is the Christ' or 'Look, there he is!' do not believe it. For false Christs and false prophets will apear and perform signs and miracles to deceive the elect-if that were possible. So be on your guard; I have told you everything ahead of time.
Mark 13:1-23
May the Lord Bless you:)
