2nd September: Pamela Foo
26th September 2007: Kimberle & Stephanie
28th September 2007: Chieh Hwee


Conclusion: Sending people off causes a spiraling into depression
It's really sad to send people off. At first it didnt feel like anything...Pamela then Kimberle.. and today was Chieh. And as it dawned on me this afternoon that they were just leaving one by one.. it was a thought so unbearable i couldn't continue studying my Distribution Coefficients and Heterocycle nomenclatures anymore.

Wednesday was fun. With just a tinge of sadness, with kimbo nimbo leaving us. We (chieh, hw, ying & I) played UNO on the train home. Little did it occur to me that chieh won't be here to do that with us today. It was as though it was J1 again. playing bridge and asshole daidee like nobody's business (and of course in J2 when that stupid 360deg cam had to be above our class bench)
Today more people came, cos the guys could book out and rush over.
And it was sadness, with a tinge of happiness.
but it was just so nice to see fellow 78ers again. We love 78! and we are so special cos we are of the 78 breed.

It's probably a need for human beings to seek identity, to hold on to something in the midst of waves of need-to-dos that often throw us off our feet. We seek to be something, lest we realize we aren't anything. Which today I learnt of myself - a person who really cherishes relationships, sometimes fearing comittment lest departure comes. And what I know, and I must learn, is to rely on God solely. As the only source that can satisfy me. Not through friendships or any other relationships and neglecting God. There's always this emptiness inside everybody. And until we learn to admit and accept that.. we'd probably busy chasing every fleeting thing we hope could satisfy us.

One thing I hate - is the emptiness that comes after hype. That always leaves me teary, for no apparent reason. cos everybody's gone. that's why. after all the together-ness, and fun and ra-ra-ing. everybody will just go on. just like that. and it has always been this desire in me - to find a worthy friend. I know I found Him.. now it's time to know Him better:)

There is no one like You, there is no one like You.. Jesus

somehow this line of a hillsong is just playing in my head right now.

What if I were to leave one day.
What would I miss the most? I guess I'd miss tons of relationships, tons of local food to a lesser extent, and still.. tons of friends. I wish when such a day really comes.. I'd be able to say with all my heart - "The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want" - physically, in material needs & emotionally.

Learn to let somethings go. And make the best of whatever we have - cos nothing we have will really stay forever.