i feel terrible.
i am not physically tired..but im tired in almost all other aspects.

i won't wanna do this again.
don't want to.

school's starting and maybe its time for distance.

I'm building myself a santurary today.
I'm retreating to create order in my chaotic room.
My neglected garden.
My safest place.

where temperature, sound, sight, feelings, time can all be controlled in my hands.
where there is just one person
who knows all what i wanna do and like to do and the way to do things.

collapsing will probably just do me some good.

today, again, i ponder.
on the friendships in my life.
seems like another superficial surreal world.

I wish I had a friend who always stood by me.. gung ho with me. chiong with me.
through the dirt and dust, through difficulties, a hug that goes right into the heart.

I don't like fat boys.
why do people like pairing me up with the fat boy.

Labels: ministry, S.T.R.E.S.S., sian