to write the happy things on stone.

and the unhappy ones on sand.

that the wind may blow and erase the unhappy ones..
and leave the delightful ones etched in my memory.

perhaps the sun had set when i was still angry.
but there's always grace to forgive, forget and love:)

Labels: S.T.R.E.S.S., sillythings

today i passed by this booth. that had a canoe and polo balls round it.

i was so distracted, i found myself walking toward it.
this was precisely what i had been thinking about months ago. and told huiwen.
i saw a few familiar faces, and contemplated if i should return to the canoeing world - at the risk of my grades, back and time.

tue, thursdays 6 to 11pm.
that means tuitions must only be on wednesdays.
that means no working at church on thursdays.
that means no discipleships on thursdays.
that means extra catch up time on monday nights and no more prayer meetings.

it means exercise, training, POSSIBLE FUN, getting fit again.
i dont know if i will meet the same problem again i had in hcanoe.
i dont know how open they are to noobies like me, and how flexible their trainings are.

there is training on sundays in SCHOOL too. if only it was at kallang!
then it would have been much convenient for me.

aiyah, i dont feel like giving up this opportunity.. now that i found out about canoe polo. without much deliberate effort..
i wonder if it is a test, or an opportunity.
seems like the former.

anyway, things didnt go out too well today. I am quite stressed cos i have to finish the projectionist SOP and do a multitude of homework too. I didn't even tell mum i'm not going to work. goodness.
but at least i invited another friend to come and join us for reunion lunch :)

but God gives the increase..

I was so tired i took a 2h sleep instead of a 0.5h one.
no, i don't think i managed to pass the virus down yet.. I will sleep early tonight and rise early tomorrow morning. busy day ahead, busy weekend ahead:

things to do tmr:
- Call Achieve Pte Ltd
- START reading natural heritage textbook
- write finish my letters to 3 lovelies overseas, for Valentines & buy postage?
- prepare for my short talk for freshmen seminar
- read GIT and prepare for tutorial at 1400h
- projectionist SOP
- LSM 1401 webcast - watch again. i seriously dont really understand
- study endocrine systems
- LSM assignment hand up
- collect files from popular IMM
- 1930h prayer meeting

Saturday:
- Tution
- prepare for my final written report of 10 PAGES for freshmen seminar!
- projectionist training @ 1830h
- 05S78 Dinner!!! 团圆咯!
- stay over at wen's

Sunday:
- should i check out the canoe polo training? :(
- supposed to go shopping for new year clothes with wen

dilema! how! OTTOKAE! (this is what my lab buddy always says when she's stressed during lab)

Labels: ministry, S.T.R.E.S.S., updates

歌林多前书 3:6
我栽种了， 阿波罗浇灌了， 惟有神叫他生长。

It's God who gives the increase.

so no need for stress. take heart, and do my best.

how does one fall in love. again?

maybe not then.

Labels: sillythings

回头：这几年真是匆匆过去。光阴似箭、岁月如梭，就此意？但愿仅此，并非开始。
今年过了大半个月。做了啥？
我发现2005年3月6日 - 我第二个生日。统计：2008 年1 月26日了。
我 做了什么？付出了什么？活得充实么？

没有。
再也不能自欺。
再也不能堕落、颓废、懒散、蹉跎岁月。

有个朋友常也如此说...并加上一句：就是这样，怎么办。
我相信。力量是从神而来。但也要人，愿意激发自己奋勇突破。

今年。我要改变。
因为迟到、懒散、蹉跎要过去。
积极，有效的利用时间、愿意 将是我生命的新写照！

my new year starts today.
a method of instruction
a matter of willpower

its never too late. i told myself in 2004.
i'm still telling myself that 2008.

pressing on

wahahha. Im am super stressed up these days. So stressed I think im kinda silly.
because I never bong3 all my points for round 2A bidding for electives.
now not enough modules to take for this semester.. :(
but i still have a teeny bit of chance competing with seniors in the last few rounds, when they have infinite no. of points. -.-

was so stressed up that since last morning i have been having stomach pains.
and went to bed at 10pm plus last night but couldnt sleep up til 1.30am odd.
and i woke up at 6.44am.
with the thought '9AM hurry up come' (Bidding starts)

after bong3-ing all my points already. now my heart says '11pm hurry up come' (results released)
ayes..so stressful.. and i have to do this twice every year. EEKS lah.
all that anxiety built up is bad for health. i hardly can concentrate on lectures liddat. SILLY CORS!

wow. SCHOOL'S STARTING.

okay, im not all so excited about it..due to 1001 reasons. but it will come.
but before that, we have to pay our school fees right?

and last semester I didn't know we had to apply for the CPF education scheme thing BEFORE the school bills us. and so I couldn't pay by my parent's CPF. paying it in cash is quite a hefty sum for my family. and so I enquired and got the website to check back for the next application time for the CPF thing, for this coming semester.

guess what, NUS didnt update her website. and they already sent me an email regarding school fees on 3rd Jan.
in it wrote: " you may apply for CPF Education Scheme from XX/XX/07 to 26/12/07"
I was like 'what?!'
cos I always checked that website given to me.
I wonder if it has been updated..

but anw, i got scolded la.. and blah blah.. cos of the financial stress and stuff.
and so i applied immediately at the nearest CPF Branch,
and the person at the CPF was like.. sure approve one, its just a matter of WHEN..usually 2-3 weeks.. that was 5th Jan and 3 weeks later would be 26 Jan. -.-
dateline for updating the NUS Student Account was 21 Jan.
so that was quite a tricky bit, not very confident that our GARMENT may be that efficient.

so I appealed to NUS to allow me to pay for this term's fees via CPF though it will come late and stuff..via email. and was praying hard for God to help me.
My mum was quite sian diao and told me to settle myself. I.E. no money pay is my business (and my dad's) cos she's like angry for other reasons too.
and since my dad's english ain't that fantastic, and he's definitely clueless about such systems and paperwork, its like up to me to appeal and do the stuff. and up to him and I to raise the money.
I was thinking, get a loan first..
then at most get one more tuition, don't need to sleep for the whole semester, then pia.. then no money go for mission trip.. then pay off the loan. and suddenly a super heavy thick cloud started following abovehead..

that was saturday and stuff liddat.
was worried and at peace with God at the same time. super 矛盾 feeling. 就是那种担忧，又觉得是要信靠神的那种心情交织在一块儿..
and today, after so many days of hetic stuff.. working and being unable to check mail..
I opened up my mailbox to see a letter of approval!!

it was so fast and the office of finance was just so gracious to just extend the period for me..
i didn't even expect to see anything like that, i just wanted to clear my mail box cos i know it will pile up and i dont like clearing mails for few hours..

God really takes care of all the things in my life. big small..everything.
like how that day I was on the way home from church, at night, and I took a bus to city hall MRT. I could take an express bus from the very same bus stop I alight from and head straight home, to a bus stop near my place... OR I could walk (with no shelter) to the MRT and take train home, walk like 20 mins to reach home..
the thing is the express bus comes so infrequently you'd probably reach home by MRT faster.
and since the taxi fares are up. you can usually expect to stand from city hall, through orchard road, Bkt Timah SCGS area, all the way past Jurong East to Jurong West, which is where I stay. Tiring sia.

and when the bus reached the stop at city hall MRT, it was already pouring like crazy. I lingered for a few minutes longer than I usually would cos I wanted to throw away my drink cup. Yet it fell on the floor and I have to brave the rain for a few seconds.. sian rite? But guess what.. My express bus then stopped right in front of me.. so I happily flagged it and got on, being only minimally wet. And it was practically empty lah.. like God sent a bus to fetch me home.. and my favourite seat was empty :) WAHAHAHAHHAH. Its been ages since I managed to wait for this express bus to appear. But just when I needed it most, God sent it:)
subsequently cos of the rain, there were few cars on the road, traffic was smooth, people did get up on the bus.. but not as many as there would be since the taxi fares were up and if it wasn't raining. and I was comfortably dry, in my specially sent bus, in my prepared favourite seat, on the highway home.
and the rain had stopped where I alighted. :)

small things, BIG GOD! :D

okay, last year I went to see the dentist. The last time i went for a checkup was 2004 year end. So my dentist was quite appalled. and the previous-er time was like 2000 or 2001 when I was still in Primary 6 or just became Sec 1.
He was a funny gossippy dentist, who i blogged about, but lost the post to 'network error'..

It's funny how doctors and dentists think so highly of pharmacists. Like we have to memorise 1001 chemical names and stuff. don't the doctors have to memorise funny coupled muscles and stuff too? hmm.. or is my course really that scary.

Anyway, my 07-08 moment was spent singing birthday songs to the January babies in church. all of whom are brothers..cool!
most of the S78-ers were at marina south counting down and woo-ing to the fireworks i guess.

I wasn't too tired throughout the prayer meeting. But surprisingly woke up at 6pm after hitting my bed at 8am in the morning.
Overnight prayer meeting was good. At least I think I understood more of what we were praying and why we are praying than the prev 2 years.
since I slept 2 Jan away, it didn't really feel like it existed so there's a memory void in my brain. I'm kindda confused with dates and days now.

RVNP met up at 12pm. I woke up at 6pm to see Desmond's msg ' I will be late, I just woke up' at 11.30 am. LOL. I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw the clock also, the first thought that came to my mind is 'eh, how come my clock spoil'..

anw, boon han, zb didn't go.. so I guess it was just as well. Though 11 turned up according to zhijun. But since my true comrades didn't turn up, it wouldn't have meant much to me if I went. Bet I'd be left out again.. like every other outing. Unless zb went then we would catch up or something. But he didn't! LOL, kindda expected since he told me he would be going only if our gang turned up. Well, at least the rest had a good time, so good for them. hah.

Glad to have settled on some modules to take in the coming semester :)
Looks like Thai 101 is still evading me. and the fact that it's kindda cheap is good cos I can take it in other sems. but the 6h every week is indeed quite heavy. see how all goes..

I am so evil I psycho-ed Grace Hoo to go ubin cycling with me tmr. I love nature & I hope it won't rain. haha. my since-Post-As wish can finally be fulfilled! MUAHAHAHAH. at the expense of Grace. but ayes, have to go with a weird company. I bet they don't know who we are.. cos they are mostly those high-profile people.

It's a new year and a new semester ahead..

...but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead.
- Phillipians 3:13