"i think we have waited long enough for Aslan.."
it is the duty of the warrior to await command.

"and why did that stop you from coming to look for me?"
it is the duty of the intercessor to seek the face of God.

今天在超市看见一位小女孩，
外表甜蜜的她 静悄悄地在角落旁等待着父母排队付钱...
她与她其他姐妹有些距离...

走到陈列出来，一包包的花生面前，开始狠狠地骂了它。
“你为什么这样子
再这样 我就把你拿下来！！”

可怜的花生，再那里...一声也没吭。接着也挨小女孩的几巴掌。

可能，也许，或者，
曾经何时我也如此。
心中也如此满怀无奈，默默无声地被人冤枉。


唯有对着客观地，不带偏见的是事物才敢于表达我的心情。
但对待它们，只懂得 用别人如何对待我的方式对待带
绝不会温柔细语地对待 芭芘娃娃，只懂得造高楼大厦， 让罪大恶极的葛司啦破坏。


我的天父造我的时候，究竟是要造怎样的我？
其中别人造成的破坏，究竟在哪里使我不在计划当中那样完美？

为什么造了一个怎么喜爱阳光、沙滩、海洋的女儿..
确没让她享受在其中被满足...

为什么就是要这样？

Labels: :(, 我的良人

faithgrace is up to neck with work.

faithgrace is contemplating on joining a certain CCA that would effectively mean a reduction in income, increase in social entertainment expenditure, reduction in ministry time, and only possible personal satisfaction.
what should she do?

faithgrace is gonna press on, making the best of everything.
believing that her God is one that gives more than abundantly, more than just enough.
be it in terms of finances, in terms of time mangement, in terms of strength and creative ideas.

faithgrace needs to experience her Love of her life, anew. :)
I love You very much. *hugs*

Labels: love:), updates, vacation

ahh. a day at home.. wanted to do this and that and those.
and end up having cramps and sleeping till noon
still got to finish up packing my room, do church work from home. hahah.
have to go and run later. HAVE TO cos im getting fatt.

have to bind the last semester's stuff later.
have to go photocopy stuff later.
have to sort out loads of notes and literature in my deceivingly neat cupboard.
have to check out what cool modules to take next semester.
have to send my comforter for laundry later.

I finally finished one more book.
which makes the 4 books im reading concurrently down to 3.
and i still have a million others to wanna read.
better read my bible more.

i have a nice smelling room. and nice clean floor.
i have no bedsheets


adios
life beckons.

Labels: updates, vacation

so whats the right perception in this?

She says don't look at things from my own viewpoint only.
My viewpoint?

Don't make me happy.
因为希望越大， 失望越大。

还有什么好说的
sometimes a mindless reply, gives others false hope.
really.

I wonder what you guys were when you were young.
I don't think you'd ever understand.

It's ok, I'll find my company outside.
I'm sure I can.

Labels: :(

These two days being the most activity - cramped days of the past many years of my life.
Not work, but play activity.

How come I end up tired more than happy, empty more than satisfied.
How come I end up missing my old company of friends and being what I used to, than now.

Having to suppress all that's inside.
And missing the opporutnity.
Of course I can go play what I want by myself.

You know what loneliness is?
It's when you have a thousand and one things to do.
and not a fraction of a human being willing to go do it with you.

Of course nobody says that
Of course people try
Of course it's not what they like
and so of course it doesn't turn out to be the way it used to be..
with sun-loving friends.
who don't mind you rushing them on..
who still walk slowly anyway.
who just loves fun..
and ignores the weather, ignores the dirt, ignores the opinions of others.

ok, fine.. its just about age.
or is it?

ok fine, its not about how much i'm loved.
or is it?

thanks.
but..
ayes, thanks anw.

Labels: :(

today i 洗刷刷 half of my room.
if i 洗刷刷 whole room I don't need to sleep.

I finally have time to pack my room.
I bought these cute mini book stands at Daiso today.
Just nice fits all the books I am reading now. Really cute.

I didn't really pack. Things are just stowed out of sight.
But the main thing was getting the dust away.

I'm gonna organise my song chords.
Its like tattered and torn, and 2006 version.
We have million new songs, which I won't lead.. cos I can't sing up there, only down here.
But would like to have a proper file to put them in:)
Bought my recent favourite file - this file series have many pretty colours.
Which is the file in the Chinese Library, & many other places where I make decisions.
It's prettyy..

see, i'm the kind of kid that hangs around the school bookshop last time, with no money.. only hoping to have any one of the stationary on display

Tmr is first youth after exams!
Special special. Hope to do something funn. :)

Going for mission trip soon.
I have no idea what I am doing, where I am going.
sounds adventurous?
nope, I will know on Sunday..

I am not going for Europe trip

which means I have the money of going to Bintan for retreat with Grace Hoo.
and go for diving trip with Clara Fu to Redang! WOO HOOO~

I think it's much more worth it.
TANNED SKIN TANNED SKIN TANNED SKIN. Muahaha.

Labels: updates, vacation, yay

Really. Serving in church is no easy task.
Wednesday 11am: finish exams! WHEE~
Wednesday 12.30pm: Task #1
Thursday - Friday Whole day: PIA~~
Incomplete PPT but need to present on Friday night.
Thursday Evening: Task #2
Saturday Evening, Sunday whole day, Monday til noon: PIA~ task #2
Tuesday Afternoon: finish up lil bits of stuff
Tuesday morning: amend task #1 PPT to disseminate

WEDNESDAY: REST DAY!! = Stay at home = Pack up my room, clear up last sem's notes, clean my room, wash my clothes, wash my bedsheets, back up computer files.
If i still have time,
I can enjoy reading the four books i'm reading concurrently now.
One is just for motivation - Max Lucado's
One is just for story - Biographies of Great women of faith
One is just for science knowledge - the scientific proof of God (just curious)
One is realy spiritual solid food - Dr Bailey's book

I'm gona dig up my unused notebooks and take down some serious notes this time :)

so that's how you read many books at one time, read different kinds.


I was so exhausted ytd i K.O.-ed at 10.20pm. My usual sleeping time is 2am.
and had a really nice deep sleep :)
after a whole day with Joanna singing to each other in weird sentences, made to sync with a queer rhythm we came up with, playing ping pong for the 2nd time in my life, playing badminton, tanning, sauna-ing, eating this funny red tiger noodles at westmall..
age is seriously catching up :( better go run tmr morning!

and anw, i'm not very bookish so i get bored reading either one book.
so i can switch like watching TV. except textbooks.. like ze 3rd book..
of to reading that now. internet sucks tonight. adios~

Labels: updates, vacation

In a wink of an eye I have finished one year of university!
I hope that I do well this time. not like the other time..

I shall not talk about my papers, for that's really of no point.
I won't say I have done my utmost best. Mostly trying hard to self-motivate.
Immediately after exams I reverted to become a full-time kingdom worker. HA. and then i realised how slack I have been during my 闭关修炼 days at home!
I sleep like till 10am and study, cook lunch, eat lunch, study, jog, watch tv then sleep... waking up the next 10am.
Thats totally a luxury to many people in church!

Wednesday mummyee and gege came to eat with my pharmacy friends.
I think i need like 100 million tons of weight on my heart to stop it from throbbing sometimes..
And today invited my parents and grandparents to Parent's Day.
I'm glad that my faithful God made everything great. The day even started out great.. really everybody quite happy and joyful kind. Not like usual very stress and stuff.
Even more thankful that I am not like serving heavily during the event and I can attend to them properly.
All my previous fears were kindda redundant :)
God is really really faithful. He keeps His promises, and is always there to help even though we fear and panick. I'm sure He's looking upon us with a smile :)

Waiting for all the parent's day information to come in to embark on a scary journey of data consolidation.
All that I have planned to do like pack my room, clean up and replenish my room stuff (like my thirsty hippo) was supposed to have been completed.
They took a back seat but I'm glad I have been of any use :)

Yayys. I'm probably gonna find a job and work during holidays
going for retreat with Grace Hoo, going for mission trip, NOT going for Europe anymore.
I'm quite excited about the ZMIS thing, so I think I'd give it a shot! :D
Studying is what I like, what else best to study than the Word of God ? :) YAYNESS.

Labels: family, love:), ministry, updates

i was tormented by a teeny weeny insect for 6 hours
i only managed to kill it at 6.30am
then i could sleep!

i hate those centimetre long blood suckers!

you know. i really have no mood to study.
you know. i really am not studying at all.

you know. i am afraid i'd screw up again tmr.

i don't know if i should go visit Mrs Cheng tmr when I have exams on Monday that I have not prepared for.

Labels: mugging ramblings, S.T.R.E.S.S.

day 3.
you know..
i was so glad i have 5 days inbetween to study for SSS1207 & PR1103
that i didnt really prepare before hand.

now its day 3
i havent really STARTED on any.
have no idea how to study for them.

the notes are just definitions after definitoins of what is a pharmacy, pharaceutical practice, pharmacist.
the whole system of pharamcy in USA, Australia, UK, Singapore.
and how ours suck.

then there's a whole list of thing called code of ethics.
the only thing i remember is that the lecturer kept saying that its kinda useless in the real world.
but its the only ting we'll be given during the exam..
like periodic table..
SO.. they are giving us something useless for the exam.
thanks ah.

bored.
my eye hurts these few days + nights..

i wonder if i should get another tuition kid. :)
a more lucrative one. :)
i wonder what to do after exams! :)

i wonder why i am still wasting time here.

Labels: mugging ramblings

well, laborious only because i could not have stable internet access last night to post.
laborious only because i feel like posting, but have no idea what to post.

happy labour day to all.
i had the honour of waking up to a blood clotted nose this morning.. not knowing where and when the blood oozed out. it's dried up and i woke up feel really confused. LOL.
gross, some of u might wince.

anyway, i also had the previllege of joining the rare Public Holiday crowd queue at McDonald's for my beloved McGriddles.
Breakfast is always nice, in the morning, with a good book in hand.
Even nicer if you have someone special by your side.

I am wondering why on earth do I have such recurrent thoughts at an alarming frequency these days. I certainly not wish to become a desperate 20 year old.

I am half way between exams. 2 down 2 to go. not studied for them yet. don't know how to study for these two. Pharmacy Practice seriously do not have any relevance since they keep teaching us using UK and US examples and illustrations, with hundred and one lousy acronyms, to remember how to tell a patient how to take his medication.

Yesterday I did a great job of cleaning up the floor in my room.
Now I have ceramic tiles on my floor, instead of stacks of notes that make a maze in my room.

Jessica I will link you after my exams kaes :)

I went to try to book the BBQ pit for next wednesday. To no avail again! I am so bewildered. :(
Dajie says NTUC has some disposable ones.. I hope I can use that in my balcony if all else fails.

10 May is Parent's Day. I wonder if I can bring them there. Don't know if it's gonna be weird. Haish.. *dark clouds loom over my head*

Pharmaceutical Calculations and Patient Counselling.. here I come. I hope the boredom stays away today. :)

Labels: mugging ramblings, updates